I’ve realized how my relationships with my children have shifted. They are all adults and now they’re the ones giving me advice and, sometimes, I find myself taking it. They have each gone their own way. They are married or living with their partners. They have children of their own that they are raising and doing a fine job of it. They have given me beautiful grandchildren, little people who bring me the most exquisite joy to be around. My children have their own homes, their own ideas and although we don’t always agree, that hasn’t stopped us from having close ties and for that I am so grateful.

Somehow, I’ve shifted into a new season. I realized lately that I am no longer middle-aged. I’m beyond that now. And I’m really okay with it. That realization hasn’t come about because of a milestone birthday or momentous event. It just appeared. Life is slower and sweeter now. I know myself better than ever. My faith is firm, my priorities set. Lessons learned over the last five and a half decades have implanted deep wisdom and I feel a desire to share that. As the Bible teaches in the book of Titus, older women are to teach what is good and to help younger women. My hope is that if I can share some of the tough lessons I’ve had to learn, I can help smooth the way for them.

My use of social media has changed as well. That happened naturally. We went on vacation and our habit is to not use social media while we are gone. When we returned, it had been some time since I posted on any of the usual sites. Instead, I shared my pictures directly with friends and relatives who were interested. That sparked some good conversation while keeping me from the comparison trap I so often scroll through. Now, instead of posting, I share beautiful everyday moments through stories with brief captions which take up very little of anyone’s time. Very quickly, more quickly than I could have imagined, that has become a habit and my new way of relating on social media.  

In the beginning, I began using the sites as a way of keeping up with my newly flown children. They were starting out on their own and I told myself this was a good way of staying in touch. But the truth is, my kids are another generation removed, they use social media very differently and usually not on the platforms that I use. I stayed on those out of sheer habit and laziness slowly realizing it wasn’t helping my connection to them but keeping me too busy to reach out.

Watching my adult children impact their world is an often joyful, sometimes terrifying place to be. It has taken time to get to a place of mutual respect but I can truly say I am proud of the people they have become. My time now is my own to use or to lose. This is a new season, a time to watch and listen and a time to invest in others the wisdom of a certain age.